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Collaboration in Children’s Well-Being Classes How safety, choice, and structure help children work together well
Collaboration is something I’m often asked about when people observe my classes. Last week, a teacher passing through the hall through one of my classes, popped back at lunch and asked, “That's a tricky bunch- how did you get them to work like that together?” And the truth is, collaboration in my well-being sessions is never accidental. It is rooted in how children actually feel in their bodies and nervous systems. Whether I’m teaching in schools, delivering community workshops, or training other children’s well-being practitioners, collaboration is a key feature of my sessions. Over time, I’ve realised there are five core elements that consistently support successful collaboration with children: Safety, choice, boundaries, structure, and freedom All held together by an umbrella principle: autonomy (if you've read or watched my stuff before, you'll know that this is a big one for me!). I’ll share what each of these looks like in practice and why they matter so much, particularly for neurodivergent children and those who may find social situations tricky. 1. Safety comes first (always) Before children can collaborate, they need to feel safe. Not just physically, but emotionally and psychologically safe too. Whenever I invite children to work with a partner or group, I always approach it through the lens of safety. If a child is unsure who to work with, I don’t ask, “Who’s your friend?” I ask: “Who do you feel safe with?” That question is really important. Many children, especially neurodivergent children, may not be clear on social labels like “friend”. Friendship can be confusing. But they usually know, very clearly, who feels safe and who doesn’t. Learning to notice that internal signal is a powerful life skill in itself. Collaboration works best when children are practising with people who help their nervous system feel settled, not threatened. 2. Choice builds trust and autonomy Choice is sometimes seen as controversial in group work with children. There’s a common belief that children should simply work with whoever they’re placed with because:
But from both a practical and psychological point of view, choice matters. When children have some say in who they work with:
Choice doesn’t mean chaos. It means children feel respected within the system you’re holding. And when children feel respected, they’re far more likely to engage meaningfully. 3. Clear boundaries make collaboration safe I’m very explicit about what is and isn’t acceptable when children collaborate in my sessions. If children choose to work with a friend, that’s absolutely fine, as long as their behaviour stays within the agreed boundaries of the lesson. This includes:
I have found that boundaries make collaboration possible. 4. Structure gives children clarity Whenever children work together in my classes, there is always a clear structure. Children need to know:
I often think of structure as a container. Inside that container, children can explore, create, and collaborate freely, but the container itself keeps everything steady. For example, I might say:
5. Freedom allows creativity and engagement Within that clear structure, children have a lot of freedom. They can:
Tasks are intentionally open-ended. This invites imagination, creativity, and problem-solving, all while staying within safe and predictable boundaries. I support children with visual pose banks matched to their developmental stage. These give just enough scaffolding without limiting choice. These pose banks are a core part of The Well-Being Adventurers Toolkit provided as part of The Well-Being Journey training. What collaboration looks like in practice In my sessions:
I no longer insist on fixed numbers like pairs or groups of three. I used to do that, but I realised that the rigidity of it wasn’t serving the children, it was just habit. What matters more to me is that children are:
If children are not following expectations, I’m clear and calm about stepping in and separating them. That consistency helps everyone feel safe. Novelty keeps brains engaged While repetition is important for learning, our brains are also wired for novelty. I often add small changes to collaborative tasks:
What doesn’t change is my expectation. Children know what collaboration looks like in my classes, and that predictability supports calm. “But children need to learn to work with everyone…” This is something I hear often, and yes, there’s truth in it. However, children are not adults. They learn collaboration skills by practising them first in safe spaces with safe people. That’s how confidence and competence develop. Learning who feels safe and who doesn’t is a vital protective skill. One that may genuinely keep a child safe later in life. That said, there are times in my lessons where children work with someone they haven’t chosen. When I do this:
Final thoughts When collaboration is built on safety, choice, boundaries, structure, and freedom, children don’t just “work together”, they learn how to navigate relationships, listen to their bodies, and regulate themselves in shared spaces. If you struggle with managing group work or behaviour in your classes, you may find my self-paced course Tame the Crowd Without Being Loud helpful. It’s designed to support calm, connected, and well-held sessions without raising your voice. You’re also very welcome to book a mentoring session with me if this is something you’d like more support with, I'm currently running a special offer of just £97 (usually £200) for an hour meeting. And I’d genuinely love to hear your thoughts. What do you agree with? What feels challenging? How do you support collaboration in your own classes?
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Children’s Mental Health Week: Fostering BelongingThis week is Children’s Mental Health Week, and this year’s theme, “This Is My Place”, invites us to reflect on something quietly powerful: belonging.
Belonging is not a soft extra. It is a psychological need, deeply woven into children’s mental health, learning, and long-term well-being. As Place2Be so clearly articulate, when children and young people experience a strong sense of belonging, they are more likely to:
How intentionally are we creating belonging in the environments we lead? At Well-Being Adventurers, fostering a sense of belonging is not an add on. It is foundational to everything we do. Children cannot meaningfully engage with movement, breathing, or relaxation if they do not first feel safe, included, and valued. Below, I’m sharing some of the ways we intentionally nurture belonging in our classes and workshops. Whether you are considering working with Well-Being Adventurers, or you are looking to strengthen your own practice as an educator or well-being practitioner, I hope these reflections offer practical value. 1. Helping Children Feel Seen and Valued Belonging begins with being recognised. In our sessions, we prioritise genuine connection with children. When working in schools, we ask for name cards so that we can address each child by name. This might sound simple, but being named matters. It signals: I see you. You matter here. From a psychological perspective, this aligns with children’s need for relatedness and emotional safety. When children feel seen, their nervous systems settle. When they feel valued, they are more willing to engage, take risks, and participate authentically. For practitioners, this is a powerful reminder that belonging often starts with small, consistent relational practices rather than grand interventions. 2. Getting Everyone Involved (Not Just the Confident Few) Belonging cannot grow on the sidelines. At Well-Being Adventurers, we design sessions for maximum engagement. This means planning carefully so children are not left waiting, watching, or simply copying for long periods of time. We use:
For educators and well-being practitioners, this approach supports inclusion, reduces comparison, and helps children who might otherwise withdraw or mask to stay connected. 3. Promoting Collaboration (And Teaching the Skills to Do It) Collaboration is not innate. It is learned, and for some it is really hard to learn! In Well-Being Adventurers sessions, we intentionally include partner and group work, while recognising that working with others can be genuinely challenging for some children. Rather than avoiding collaboration, we:
Belonging grows when children feel supported to navigate relationships, not judged for finding them hard. 4. Accepting and Celebrating Differences: Meeting Children Where They Are True belonging does not ask children to change who they are. At the heart of Well-Being Adventurers practice is the belief that children deserve to be accepted as they are, not as we wish them to be. Our resources are deliberately designed to:
Children are always given choices. There is no single “right” way to move, breathe, or relax. This approach aligns with inclusive, trauma-informed, and neuro-affirming practice. When children experience acceptance, they learn that they do not need to hide parts of themselves in order to belong. 5. Belonging Starts Within: Helping Children Feel at Home in Themselves Perhaps the most important sense of belonging is the one we help children cultivate inside themselves. Through movement, breathing, and relaxation, we teach children how to:
This is why we place such strong emphasis on embodied well-being. Belonging is not just social. It is physiological, emotional, and deeply personal. A Final Reflection for Practitioners Belonging is not created through posters, themes, or one-off activities. It is built through intentional practice, relational safety, and consistent inclusion. Children’s Mental Health Week offers a valuable pause point. A chance to reflect not just on what we teach, but how it feels to be in the spaces we lead. Whether you are an educator, a yoga teacher, or a mindfulness practitioner, the question remains the same: Do the children in my care feel that this is their place? If the answer is “mostly”, well done! You are doing great! And if it’s “I’m not sure yet”, that curiosity is where growth begins, perhaps ask the children you work with 🌱 If you’d like support here, reach out. To get Well-Being Adventurers workshops or training in your education setting, email [email protected] To get support as a children's well-being practitioner (yoga or mindfulness teacher) email [email protected] |
From Julia
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February 2026
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